A microaggression is a subtle, often unintentional, form of prejudice. Rather than an overt declaration of racism or sexism, a microaggression often takes the shape of an offhanded comment, an inadvertently painful joke, or a pointed insult. For example, a white manager might comment that an Asian American employee speaks English well. A white student might ask where an Indian American student is from. A white woman may cross the street when she sees an African American man walking toward her at night. The white individual may not have intended to offend the person of color, but the comment still reminds the person of color that they are not fully accepted or trusted in their community. Experiencing microaggressions on a daily basis can be deeply stressful. The experience can also be unsettling, because the marginalized person may struggle to understand if the comment was intentional and how to respond.
According to Wikipedia: Microaggressions are defined as brief and commonplace daily verbal, behavioral, or environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative attitudes toward stigmatized or culturally marginalized groups. Here are two of the worst ones I have heard and the context in which they were said:
- “You are not like other black people, you’re intelligent, you’re more articulate”.
I have heard this one often. I think that the white people that say this think that they are paying me a compliment. If you think about it, it really is not. It is a microaggression alright because it implies that other black people are not intelligent and articulate. There is something fundamentally wrong with saying these words. It is as if I say to a white person: “You’re the most intelligent white person I know”. Doesn’t really sound nice, does it?
2. “I know that that bright color matches your skin, but it hurts my eyes”.
Several of my white bosses have said this to me and it has made me really self-conscious. Apparently, bright, vibrant colors that heighten the beauty of my black skin give them a headache. It is as if I said to them: “These neutral tones that you wear make me feel seasick”. Doesn’t that sound like an insensitive comment to make to someone?
According to Psychology Today, many social psychologists suggest that most people, harbor unconscious biases and prejudices that leak out in many interpersonal situations and decision points. Getting perpetrators to realize that they are acting in a biased manner is a monumental task because (a) on a conscious level they see themselves as fair-minded individuals who would never consciously discriminate, (b) they are genuinely not aware of their biases, and (c) their self-image of being “a good moral human being” is assailed if they realize and acknowledge that they possess biased thoughts, attitudes and feelings that harm people of color.
Indeed, most of the people who have made these comments have no idea just how hurtful they were. Some microaggressions are repeated over and over for example, the one about my choice of vibrant colored clothing or how I am unlike other black people. By their very name, microaggressions seem small, but in reality, they have major repercussions on people’s lives. To test whether or not a particular comment is a microaggression, one must say it to oneself and see how it makes one feel. If it sounds right, then chances are it is okay to say it. As a general rule, however, be empathetic and kind.
